Boots the father and the son Snippet from ...Crazy enough to love me

( After a long silence) Son… when the time comes (sad eyes) you will meet the ancestors when they need you as they need me soon, until then don’t worry about them too much just know they watch over you at all time, you carry them in your veins so never fear that your alone , when you look in the mirror they are also looking back at you …  never be afraid to war  to protect the family and what is rightfully yours  like freedom love and dignity things Ggven by Mr Gods (hesitation) …I am not  as super as you think I am man who has moments of genius … but to be a super hero son  like the greats …(laughing ) like me it’s all in the boots, Superman boots, Batman Boots, Super fly boots, Jimmy Hendrix boots, Bob Marley boots, Shaft the boooots.”

(In awe) Wow dad . (slapping his forehead) The booooots … silly me and  all this time I thought it was in the cape and wearing your undies outside kind of silly, now I can look cool like you and keep my undie s private I really didn’t  want the girls see my private ones”

( laughing at the reasoning of a child) “No  your secret safe with me and your mom, son it’s all in the boots and a good leather jacket helps, it’s like your cape”

“oh … boots, leather jacket got it …. Dad can you put me on your shoulders so I can practice flying”

“(laughing) sure son anything you want, accept coming with me to visit the ancestors”

i aint' leaving ... ever Letter 38

Believe me and if not… Then … “Mr Gods please tell her for me” If the tests came back negatively opposite for Cancer and they shaved your hair off or you lost a breast, 
I ‘m a be the one  to first one to step up and say yes to the really real  love test, when you throw up I am a be the clean-up, lean up, to hold up  to get up the stairs hop on my back or is it the arms express but we are going up just say giddy up, woman when i said  forever i meant it so while lying in bed resting  i will give the sexy smile you will always be beautiful to me i be  "whats up" like its a first but this in the condition Ayo can drop you a poem  with your permission, this is not slavery and you will never be a burden we are the definition of commit a lot of people say it we will live and pray it, drink from my heart there will always be love water in this cup for you and our children… if the rumor of tumor  was not a rumor … how do you like my new ink  you now our scars are in sync ... so if it was on your head look at how think ....


Shorty we got excited  Mr Gods blessed us but then somehow  we lost the baby , your pain is deeper than mine so every night i will hold you,  i understand you don't want to make love i'll just hold do you , i am doing my best to keep it together but understand we both going half crazy you can thank the amazing two that raised me .If you had an accident and broke your back, i promised at those stairs woman in this house there would never be lack, i would have to become a master of time , double up on the grind  and still give you the most precious thing i can give you ... no woman not the D lol kidding my time.



There are times when we both are gonna get heated (you know you), i don't know maybe lifes hit that hard all at once and feel we both feel defeated, i am staying  with you my pride i am eat , Mr Gods i can please  get heavenly string and needle a portion of divine  her hearts bleeding and need  it... we need it .' and should the father call me back up into the heavens  when you walk and stare up everyday  and that one sing cloud stalks you.. i told you i will stay...

Nothings put above us ....letters to my future wife 37

You show me more mind more kind , your heart and less skin , and I respect you for that Ma we trying to get there and we got the map....you write on my back while I write my raps, it your mind i want to get in first to satisfy a hidden thirty, i seen i don't think you have issues  i think your souls longed for my soul tissue, Northern star understand i miss you Mr Gods called me a king with no crown   he called you Queen when you were become still a verb and not a noun, like the underground i down , the way we make eye contact  i make sure in the here know, I don’t know how much time we have Mr Gods going to give but making you best art in the world and laughter and you Aghhh when  I break your back the best sound. 

Is it just the way we are or the fact that every morning we both wake and on our minds we contemplate how to make the other want to feel, outsider said it would last puppy love honey moon periods … silently proven wrong by time unless we get remarried at the start of every week, you make me feel like a man strong and find way to make your legs go weak , you polish the bomb  I walk through the door  your looking like the A bomb , playing in the back ground R Kelly I don’t see nothing wrong… I think "Mr God everybody deserves someone  who really intensely love "I"  so please protect us … I remember my vows to put nothing above us and always respecter us

Standing in front of you at night is like when I stand in front a mic about to drop that real boom bap rap my life and have the greatest Audience. When you ask me … I won’t say "I say sorry I am too busy ?”  maybe I will the one ask  “so happy are you to see ?” if I did slap me until I am dissy  the kiss me on the for head and make love to me until I am dissy, we lay back for real …like Sunday on Lionel for its too easy… I am the sun you’re the moon every time we cross paths it now you to kiss me … you’re the simplest part of  the after vows new life’s philosophy  “Woman just love me ?”... your heart body and mind proud to be the protector, if died and came back i be Like Dj Mr Gods rewind selector

You will always feel love in me ...letter to my future wife 36

Queen … if I could give you one gift in this life time and Mr Gods told me you have 10 minutes before I call you home talk to her son. I would only ask him for one thing “Lord give her the ability to see herself through my eye’s maybe then she will realize how precious she is not only to me but the world and everything she touches, you can tell her my dark secret that sometimes I get jealous childishly to the fact that I have to share her precious time with the people of this world who don’t see what I see a Cloud walkeress my Queen.

Should you ever fall from grace ...  and just to make it clear that’s just impossible in my eye’s but not to the world , my face  will the first that you see with a smile of comfort to give you confidence your safe place… my hand will be the first one to reach out to pull you up  cover you and need be wage war… my soul will take shirt off its own back cover nakedness , these lips my lungs will perform self esteem CPR until I can restore shine to dim they put on your star, if only you could see through my eyes who you are.

Beautiful is not what I call you it’s just the name on your birth certificate the doctor’s office forgot to write down and Mr Gods sent me here personally to remind you of. Precious is not what you are but what’s intricately woven into your whole being and soul in your aura and radiates through your expression and your eyes betray it the preciousness all the time, sexy Dear lord don’t get me started  it’s like all my sense get bombarded my eyes are canvas that’s why is stare so hard and you...  all of you, your walk, talk  sass ,attitude ,skin, smell all are the  genius of mad artist sexy 

Babe you’re a diamond in my eye not so much because you beautiful and you are eternally will always be, but simply because they can't break you I marvel at your strength and resilience, I love how you take pride in your scars they your scars that is don’t mean your damaged goods, they simply tell a story of some who went to war had wins and looses but got the victory but most of tell the story of things you don’t speak but simply survived, which explains the tenacity in your eye’s the confidence that beams as light from you sour soul unbreakable  babe you’re a diamond in my eyes 

We laugh to argue ...letters to my future wife 35

“Woman you don’t know what you’re talking about, that's not how i remember any of it, are you off your meds... have young drinking again?” (we laugh), we argue all the time and I like it as we float along this thing called life, in our  little own custom made love ship called our home, We argue about who fell for who first and then we get into it about who fell the hardest … those are the funny funny one that never end without us making love or deep cuddles covered in silence and eye contact, it always starts with your wild  accusation  sounding  like something  like this “Boy you were gone from day one wrapped around my little pinky… and one who can blame  i mean look at me , look at this 100%  authentic can I get some more of your jelly ,type jelly boy you were not ready… yeah I thought you were cute but not all that, not like me truth is it was mercy conversation that got you in, you were more like fungus you grew on me and now I can’t get rid of you (we laugh )” and so we argue in our house filled with laughter love and banter, pillow fights that I let you win 95% of the (that competitive edge posses me lol), 5 minutes latter your laying in my arms bipolar sounding like “From day one I knew you were the one … fine specimen of man you are, my moma always said I had great taste in everything  and i guess that was men 2 and she wasn’t lying i know how to pick em, your boyish good looks chisel visage actually your chisel everything , beautiful brown eyes  staring at them “deep lake” Dziva  made wetter than a deep lake licking your lips and deep V in the corner of your hips. our conversations are like jumping off a cliff with no parachute and not being afraid to die because I know you will catch me, written  in the undertones of your voice and the prophecy that was written on smile and painted by your touch, yep I knew you were my future husband the first time slapped those fresh out the oven buns”  “ is that so ?”  “yes it is” “ it wasn’t the first time I broke you off the mamba I had your eyes in the back of your head?”(we laugh) “It’s not always about that Cloud! (poking my head playfully)  and it not always about you (attitude)…(pause) and that to papi ( we laugh) you did bring the thunder that first time ” " just the first time?" "maybe more than just the first time show me latter" we laugh “I love you” “ I love you more” “ no, I don’t think you can love me more than I love you” “ but i love you like this much”  “ you see that the problem that’s why I love you more I can’t measure it…" we laugh, like I said we argue all the time  but I don’t mind it at all… our love is a fall  no net not earth just sky falling like eagles in the sky.

We argue all the time but it’s the kind of arguing I like to do it keeps this for forever trip until god calls one home love we on fresh … you know the arguments I am talking about (laughing) we argue about who's going to be on top first latter on and for  how long, no panties on or the red or black thong (who said that lol) I argue from arguments sake because it doesn’t real matter what your wearing down there as long as it’s on and they’re coming off and we get on Marvin Gaye "lets get it on , I am good to beats it up like a  mugging the hood  “Woman black and blue, leave you with a  smile on your face but walking funny” “ you better” we laugh. We argue, and half the time I think you’re not listening to me talking to me  about what position we starting in, “ woman this is our  bedroom not a yoga class we sitting in, I don’t care what position your in as long as I am getting in” (we laugh as you put you hand on my face ).  We argue all the time“ you can have the last slice of pizza” “ nah babe  you have it I am trying watch my figure” “aight sounds good to me”(foolish man i was) “ wait so your trying to say that I am fat that’s  why you don’t want me to have the last slice of pizza [that awkward moment all men have when they realize there is no right answer to that question this chess not checker pick your next words wisely ] “Babe your perfect  as you are the truth is if I have the last slice of pizza … (sexy smile) I’m a have more energy  to work harder and longer latter on tonight to work it off to burn rubber  if you know what i mean the truth of the truth is you’re the genius” “ so your trying to say I am fat but sexy” we laugh … I get lost in the sound of your laughter and to honest Mr Gods I don’t want to found or a map.

Cookie Savage on the Forbes rich list Letters to my future wife 34

Shall I recap why you don’t call me the Cookie monster but the Cookie savage, if I recall correct I was the one talking in tongues but you were the one speaking another Language? My tongues was doing the hard yards … you stutter  “can’t bbb ... b…b b…breathe” couldn’t talk, I call that the hurricane tongue  like your tongue ain’t working, there no doubt I appreciate the naked pics you send me when I am work but Ayo Ma  the truths you look way more beautiful in person, I kiss your belly nice and slow no need to rush the flow following the map that says go low, about to be plumber and make the water flow, your skins the page my tongues my finger my body the pen, I am trying to write you a poem entitled orgasm at the end of it all, I want to ask you  where you at shorty ? I won’t be happy and have to do it again unless your reply is I don’t know…

I spend my day thinking about the little things I can do to you to make you make that “aaahhh!” sound, I love that look in your eye as I take off my shirt and tell you “woman tonight my body is you play ground”, the way get on top of me the of 360 ass tender to touch but solid round, inch by inch  yeah that right ma I can feel your heart faster as it pounds, talk is cheap Ma all verbs now no nouns  just “aaaah” sound. Dam I remember making love to you on blanket on the beach in front of ocean, the moon light, lighting your skin so perfect reflecting your inner goddess causing my mind hidden commotion the waves singing a beautiful song with deep rhythm but at the same time watching and giving a standing ovation, you make me demi god the universe watches in dis belief the stars wink and moon looks on kind of jealous, you call me the savage but there are time you leave marks on my body and do things to me that let me know I have no idea who you sometimes, when we make love love even the heavens have to witness… from the first time I made love to you I don’t care what warren buffet has I was on the Forbes rich list woman you are Heavens richness

Letter from Father to his Surrogate daughter pt 1

Sometimes I wish I was your real biological father, simply because you’re beautiful… mind body and soul note I didn’t say perfect I said beautiful and imagine in my own strange way somehow I might of contributed to your DNA genetic code make up which is not true and never will be … I take heart in that as we walk to together I hope to contribute to the DNA of your life’s sweet memories, soul and mind … tenacity audacity I got this and don’t take shit from people and life mentality when life’s unkind. Children learn from what they see not what we say and your smart and not blind, understand I am just a man super as a father the flaws show from the cracks inside so know along this journey I will show my wrong and right… sound foolish but by watching me I hope I am your cheat code to life, you can be anything you want to be in life with hard work determination but I assure it won’t happen overnight … more than a woman  a dream chaser in the life you will more than someone mother and wife. Best thing I can teach  you is stay focus, unless that man actually is the one and you’re sure don’t simply accept gifts they often come with motive’s… 

My secret super powers letter to my future wife 33

Woman have I ever told you how Amazing your first name sounds next to my last one. (Laughing) You have me using my husbandly super hero powers so that I can love you fearlessly …unconditionally,  the way I said I would when I gave you my “word is bond” in the vows, before I met you my soul was lonely for a long time and I promised myself not to take the goodness that is you for granted. When I dropped a knee Queen I knew I had met a soul I would not love based on circumstance or preference like the rest of the world we live in, a world that loves based on “if I like what you like, you will like me” if I do what you do or what you expect of me you will accept me nah Ma that’s not us we on that other level we different and we like it like that. Despite our imperfection failure and flaws Mr Gods gave us a new lens and in each other we saw something special precious worth brushing off the dust nurturing and unapologetic-ally loving…

So Mr God give me courage to fearlessly openly vulnerably love her… despite what she might do to hurt me, despite those moments when treats me not so quite right we all human and we all have moments some more than others lol, give me that courage to love her this way despite what going on at work in my own crazy family, in my career lord knows I am not getting any younger in my body, woman I am using my husbandly super hero power so that when life unavoidable difficulties visit us you can count on as you did in the past to bend but not break and never take out on you if anything extend my hand open and warm for you. Woman you count on me that when life gets messy … I run into the telephone both and transform into a mop (what? Don’t judge me lol it’s my poem I say what I want) and clean it up, and whne you need and crave intimacy where other men ran and called you clingy,  that’s when I put on my cape  sorry no take off my shirt tap the left side of bring it in and turn into your personal supper teddy 

Put it on me... your Nurture Letter to my Future wife 32

Your nurture for me reminds me that in life I have made a lot of bad decision and you’re so on the opposite side of that scale ... forever (laughing), your nurture Queen has built the kind trust between two human beings that makes me unlearn all the foolishness we are taught as boys 2 men and not the group, and woman I know your curious because you know I have them I just hide them well, your nurture lets me  trust you enough  to show you the cracks in Armour and tell you the stories of wars I fought and won and lost for them to be there. Your nurture takes me back to being a child and I want it, the way I would wait when mama was making a cake just to lick the spoon that how amazing your loving and affection feel unapologetic ally I want it, I am embrace it, dam it I inhale it just being real.

Your nurture blows my mind and  in my mind I say, and it should be on my lips in your ears but forgive me I am a man (lol) I think, Mr Gods this is my ride or die for real and thank you, it sounds wrong but somehow its right, it’s crazy how you go down on me not because you want to or some kinky fetish picked up from porn, but because you know it makes me happy and on this day when I got home from the world from my body language and fake smile you could tell my day was crappy last thing i heard from her lips was lay down papi (lol). Men we don’t say it or say it not enough but it’s those little things you do that  make me Think I married a boss Chick who handle her business she got this she got us,  I would never cheat hell no, why give up a steak for burger never (laughing).

Your nurture for me Ma lets me know that I am going to stay even when I don’t know? this is a confession from a real man Ma staying for man when he doesn’t know is hard most leave or stay and start to grunt, but your nurture lets me know we are on that grow old and grey love we be like 60 and still arguing about who loves who more making our grand children say "get a room" and "i am about to throw up", your nurture is the gift and  I am grateful but (with a smile) I more in love with the giver than gift when I get you I get it, and you get me and i get you then we be the “we”.

Your nurture resurrects my faith in fairy tales that crumbled along time ago, trust me Babe before I met you I fought so many monsters I thought I had founds princess kissed them sadly gave them my heart only to find out they were witches , but you know this already ... my hearts in your hands take a look at the stitches , you’re the one who did the repair work and now your my hearts guardian , we change roles from time to time, right now your nurture time switch ..I am the plant and you’re the sun , when I am the root and you’re the water , when I am confused and your direction , your nurture is my hearts protection.

Feeling hatred for the first time -snippet "Crazy enough to love me"

Hatred for the first time

Time slowed down, it felt like I had left my body and I watched as my soul cringed slowly and painfully, it’s the strangest experience to be the third person watching like voyeur of your own life and feeling sorry for yourself, for the first time in my life I was feeling and experiencing something totally new and I did not like it at all, no sir not one single bit. It had nothing to do with me as a human being and who I was as person, it had nothing to do with who I was in Ubuntu, it had nothing to do with the good teachings my loving parents have tried to impart into me to make me a good man. It made my inner light dim, it made my ears deafen toward the sweet whispers of the ancestors, the worst part was that it made feel distant from Mr Gods, whatever it was  it truly ugly “get it off me !” “Get it out of me!”,  As I watched myself struggle with it, I had never ever felt so helpless. For the first time ever in my life with my nap pulsing and my muscles shaking, they had found a way to make me feel hatred and it was toward them, as the salvia slowly dripped down my cheek from the place that it had landed.

[me speaking to myself]

Letter to my inner king….

Wake up!… I need you to wake up again. I know that I am the one who did it… did this to us, it’s my fault, I am the one who lay you down to sleep, but please understand that I only did it to protect you from an enemy who was hell bent on destroying you in your infancy before you had learnt how to war and survive the strange assassins of manhood and brutish emasculating force of life designed by them the bald heads, the problem lies in this you have being asleep so long that a part of you has forgotten who you are, you started becoming a king while you were still in your slumber, but when I had laid you down to sleep you were a prince, and as a prince precious lessons on how to war were missed, when you were violently woken up in chains and they fooled you into believing  you’re a slave. But of late your deep inner thoughts betray you with visions of crowns family history and glory, your soul dares you to hold your chest up with a pride and dares you to beat to let the ancestors know that you still here … while you whisper ancient prayers into the wind and talk with the sky, your intellect has deducted that somethings amiss and your nostril hair burns because of the scent of the deeply rooted lie about your identity burns, your heart has spoken to you with words that are foreign to them but you understand each letter clearly, but these words don’t make sense to your circumstance… as you question and quiz yourself …  when was the last time you ran free in paths of your own mind and the plans of your own land of true originality, when was the last time  the inner beasts in you roared so loud they garnered the heavens attention and shook hell itself, your roar was so pure with life and essence your lungs were empty and all pain and frustration was elevated,  all who heard the roar in the inner sanctum of your head fell to one knee and you were  once again the master of your fate and the feeler of own heart…

Please wake up… wake up please

I give you my word as it is bond and if I must I will draw my own blood to make a mark that I will I will never make you sleep again, this is the last time ever that we will be parted one heart one soul one mind, I will war for you, without you I am incomplete and our separation was like a walk through hell and time felt like an eternity … don’t open your eyes because they are already open … I need you to wake up for me, we are the last of our kind a dying breed and if you don’t wake up soon we will be extinct … Wake to me … reign as your ancestors did to my inner king… Dziva wake up!

Iceberg love letters to my future wife 31

Woman your heart will never bleed in silence in my presence, your tears I collect them and hold the sacred believe me your pain when it happens feels like our death sentence, this thing that we share that I call love or the “We”… to world is an iceberg, what they see is nothing real it what’s unseen that’s the real us captured only by the angels lenses…

Don’t forget the iceberg sunk the titanic I might be the Sun but believe me you’re the planet, Dam like when you walk through the do all I can do is marvel and watch each motion in slow motion like kid watching magic, more than a hour away its straight withdrawal I am self-confessed addict, in the back of my head I laugh at and in strange way thank the clowns that broke your heart before they had Queen in the palm of the hand and didn’t know they had it, intoxicate and it not overrated like when you put the joint to your lips or when the fire water hits my soul after a sip … I am not afraid to take it there ma to the drip …

Now that everybody has a tight body and a fat ass what sets you apart, what makes me stay and respect my promise of fidelity, simple you have that iceberg factor… your conversation and mental stimulus is nuclear reactor, your raw rugged and yet somehow super feminine the realness the what you see is what you get, these other women well they there trying to get an Oscar type actors. In the bedroom (oh dear lol) these girl are T rex, but you’re a savage on the D and when give the B  or the cookie that’s why they can’t compete with a raptor. 

Karma (Freedom) Barz verse 1

Freedom aka (Karma)

Love the streets of Auckland, once you were warm now you’re cold

Got me feeling like I am standing on the same blocks where the slaves used to get sold

Feeling like my life that story that was never really told

Tatted ghosts on my trigger finger now we know that the truth being told

Sons of the son of the son so my truths way to bold

Bright light, unscripted theatre we watch as the future unfolds

 Deep lake mind state that’s right we cracked the code

We got to fight for our freedoms click clack we lock and load

Keep doing dumb shit for real the racist doesn’t know

I can’t drown in this bitch, Dziva, nigga I was born in the flow

I already fucked with the game your lying in the after glow

Baobab type roots is what is hidden under the afro

An advisor to the Osiris  I am changing the time line

Sometimes confused with Xzibit because when I spit I must shine

Making time for our youth you’re the diamonds in the mine

 I ain’t trying to build bodies young kings we build minds

Scars on my soul from protecting what’s mine

Scars on knuckles from fighting for what’s mine

3^rd eye deep vision that I get from the I and I

He told me be careful of the man with fork tongue he can only speak lie

Hook-

I want free I want free I want this free……dom

Just give me my free…..dom I onl ever wanted my free…………dom

Barz of love ...letters to my future wife 30

Just before lunch time he walks into her work place with his two friends and a hand full roses wearing  shades and black hates... “You forgot something this morning I thought I would deliver it myself” “awwww thats so sweet” “oh no the roses no those are for me from the fellas... it’s our friendship anniversary silly you left your keys on the dresser” handing them over. Turing a round to leave ( one of the guys starts beat boxing)…

Beautiful black queen understand you’re the one

I love the way your skins baked perfect and it glisten in the sun

Always remember you’re the daughter of the sons of the sons of the sun

Your love a bullet to the head but I bleed love form the lungs

No doubt, I look into your eyes and know I have to make every second count

That grey and old love together Queen that’s our only route

You’re beautiful when you dance full of the spirit of Ali

For the way men have treated through time, I am the one to say sorry

Your like a Marvin Gaye song that moment when he “ohhh weee”

I am be transparent for a moment more of you and less of me

Doing thing to your body I got you wetter than a sea

Blind with xstacy like “dam boy I can’t see”

I heal your heart with my love; I go in deep as in surgically

From day one we being next level mentally and spiritually

I promise to protect you at all times form all forms of harm

 Your like sweetest poem hidden the depth of the Koran

Put your body in my arms, I am be your healing balm

Lay your head up on my chest so I can sing you a plasm

I think I am losing my mind, nah it’s actually gone

I serve you in slow motion yeah I am Trey Songs

….(the other guy stands in front him)

straight into the Hook –

Something about the way you move

Makes me wana lose my mind,

Seek and I know that I am going to find

There something bout, something about you (twice)…

He hands her the rose “I love woman”, and they leave